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Well, I am a strong supporter of open source, so here's the tool that I love using myself. The good thing about this one is that the new version supports wireless LAN interface too. IpTraf is a nice Linux based network monitoring software. You can get it here and, as with other open source software, it's free.
Based on your requirements, there are four major players in the firewall market. While Check Point is known for its management capabilities, NetScreen is known for its speed, Cisco for its ability to integrate with the core of the network and Secure computing for its innovative Unified Threat Management security appliance.
For antivirus software, I have found that Trend Micro, Symantec and Network Associates (McAfee) are the best.
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